Thursday, December 4, 2008

Sleep Through the Static

I haven't slept much in the past week. Work, and life in general, have consumed me. Despite my best efforts, when my head hits the pillow, the flood gates open. The funny thing is, it's a million little things with minimal significance that lead up to something huge.
For Example: "Where's my favorite pair of Smart Wool socks?" ends with "What are the chances my child will face worldwide famine in her lifetime?"
My emotional state has always been a roller coaster. I maintain and suppress until it's too much to handle. The release can vary from a slow steady leak, to an explosion of nuclear proportions. Unfortunately, the latter is typically directed at an innocent who unknowingly trips the switch.
Monday was the beginning of a slow leak. By Tuesday evening I was beaten. My attempt at sexual release failed miserably only to add to the stress, claiming another victim.
From 8pm to 1am my mind would not let me go. Socks, self doubt, coworkers, regrets, famine, family, and blogs tore through my head. My need for a healthy outlet to ease the physical and emotional strain was critical. Amongst the flood waters, 13 Steps was born. This will be my Ground Zero for leaks and explosions; you will be my Hazmat team.
Maybe now I will be able to sleep through the static.

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